Omegle chat 2

Last one, I promise

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: are you normal?
You: ...no...imma penguin...
You: ...
You: ...
You: ...quack...
Stranger: that's a good sign
You: But it says bad, that a bad sign
Stranger: as long as you're not talking about how horny you are, i can tolerate
Stranger: now... are you aware you might be adopted, mr/ms "penguin" ?
You: I...I am?
Stranger: yes, penguins don't quack
Stranger: your parents were elephants
Stranger: i'm sorry
You: NOOOOO!!!
Stranger: the truth was bound to come out
You: That explains why I'm so tall, and grey...
You: I thought it was a growth spurt...
Stranger: not wrinkly and fat with a big nose and big ears too, i hope
Stranger: sounds like someones grandmother hahaaa
You: :)
Stranger: incidentally, not mine
You: But, how does that explain me flying?
Stranger: there is a documentary you need to watch that will explain it
Stranger: it's called "Dumbo" by Disney
You: Sounds informative
Stranger: it can be a little confronting, especially if your parents were in the circus
Stranger: which may be why you were adopted by those penguins
You: I must tell the penguins imma elephant!
You: Ive squished hundreds over the years
Stranger: no offence... but your adopted parents must be morons hahahaa
You: ....I'm cold....
Stranger: that's because you're native to africa
Stranger: or possibly india
Stranger: and it doesnt snow in either country
Stranger: damn penguins took you all the way to antarctica, didnt they?
You: Yay, I knew there was a reason I had a red dot on my forehead
You: Yes, they did
You: They are the Michael and Angelina of the penguin world
You: No brad and Angelina
Stranger: it's a sad tale.... just like when dr evil was kidnapped and raised evil by the belgians
You: Did, did he find out?
Stranger: yeah, he's austin power's brother, dougie
Stranger: but the damage was irreversible
Stranger: he's evil as a belgian waffle now
Stranger: but i'm sure you'll....
Stranger: survive
Stranger: or something
Stranger: hahahaa
You: Ya know, I can do the finger thing too
Stranger: took me a sec to realise you weren't talking about flipping me the bird hahaha
You: Lol
Stranger: is there a mini-you anywhere nearby?
You: Uh....oh, actually yes
Stranger: does he/she fit into most overhead storage bins?
You: Yes! I call him...mini me
Stranger: that sounds very convenient
You: Oh, it is
Stranger: what do you use him for?
You: For...EVIL!
You: ...
Stranger:
Stranger: hahahahhaaa
You: Good philosophy
You: Hahaha
Stranger: so far i have an image of a quacking elephant with dr evil fingers who thinks he's a penguin
Stranger: and a mini-mirror image
Stranger: of evil
You: Bingo!
You: In ANTARTICA
Stranger: well, at least you can use your ears to fly back to society, with normal folk
Stranger: not those damn, dirty penguins
You: Yeah, will the normal folk be nice.
Stranger: probably not
You: I see movies where they do tests on them
Stranger: they'll hit you with an elephant tazer and put you in the circus
You: ...quack...
Stranger: they'll probably castrate you too, just to be safe
Stranger: and mini-you will be served up as food for some.... i dunno
Stranger: indians or something
You: They sound awful!
Stranger: nonsense, i'm sure he'll be delicious
You: Ahhhh!
Stranger: if you don't mind shitting curry for a fortnight
You: I, I...must take over the world. And change all this!
Stranger: good luck with that... no one will ever trust an elephant
Stranger: especially one that can fly!
You: Noooo!
Stranger: imagine the risk of giant falling turds!
Stranger:
You: It not my fualt
Stranger: could you imagine if the CIA were listening in on this conversation? lol
You: ...their gonna take me away!
Stranger: i didn't mean that.... i meant literally
You: And, and make curry. Those animals!
Stranger: your tax payer money well spent right there hahahaa
Stranger: well, technically, get ready for this -
Stranger: your mind will be blow -
You: ...?...
Stranger: you're an elephant - YOU"RE THE ANIMAL
You: NOOOOO!!!
You: Aaahhhh!!
You: !!!
Stranger: sorry lad, just crawl back into a uterus and try to come out as something else
Stranger: mind you, will have to be a pretty bigggg uterus hahaaa
Stranger: maybe madonna has her legs open?
You: All that's near are penguins
You: Hahahhaaa
Stranger: well, i'm sure glad this turned into a NORMAL conversation
Stranger: what a relief
You: Yeah, this was strangely sane
You: Be sure to look out for me in the papers!
You: When I take over the world!
Stranger: or the births/deaths
Stranger: for when you are either born again via madonna's giant hole
Stranger: or die at the hands of curry-munching elephant eating indians
You: ...I'm scared...
Stranger: of madonna's hole?
Stranger: me too lad
Stranger: me too
Stranger: hahahaa
You: Hahhaha
Stranger: it's bad enough her arms look like a condom full of walnuts
Stranger: i shudder to think what's going on down there
You: You really don't like modanna
You: Im not looking forward to it...
Stranger: no telling what else is hiding in the bushes
You: Sorry, I have to go...
Stranger: good luck then
You: Come along mini me!
You: Mwuahhahahhaha